Talking with your doctor about sex takes some planning and preparation. Below is a guide of things to do before and during the appointment to make the conversation easier and more helpful. Accept This One Crucial Truth: YOU Have to Bring It Up I cannot emphasize this enough: most doctors will not initiate a conversation about sex, especially with older patients.

Does finding your orgasm feel like waiting for Stairway to Heaven to finally end? Welcome to sex and aging where your body plays by new rules, but the game is far from over. Orgasms are not as easy, often, or intense as they once were. Nothing is wrong with you. It’s simply time to relearn and reorient your sexual self.

When it comes to sex and aging, one thing is certain: there’s no such thing as a “one-size-fits-all” experience. Our bodies change, our hormones shift, and our joints ache, so it’s no surprise that our sex lives need a few adjustments too.

Did you grow up thinking masturbation would make you go blind or give you hairy palms? Maybe someone warned you that “nice girls” don’t do it or that too much would shrink your penis or cause your teeth to fall out.

Vaginal dryness is more common than you might think, especially as we age, affecting nearly one in two women.

You rush to the bathroom multiple times a day, hoping you’ll make it in time. You laugh a little too hard and suddenly realize your underwear’s not dry. Your friends often joke about bladder leaks, then someone squeals, “I just peed!”—and everyone laughs (nervously). Your personal motto? Never pass up a bathroom.

Dr. Janie is featured in U.S. News & World Report

Let’s get something straight from the beginning: sex is not a performance, and your penis is not the star of a one-man show. Yet, many men become fixated on erections, framing any difficulties as “performance problems”—as if sex were a test to pass or fail. That mindset reflects a long-standing (and outdated) idea that men are the sole “deliverers” of sex. It’s time to rewrite that script.

Dr. Janie is interviewed by Larry Mantle on AirTalk