11 Ways to Enhance Your Orgasms After 60

Your Best Orgasms Are Still Ahead of You

A few years ago, I noticed almost all the attention and research on sex and aging focused on problems and dysfunction. You know the litany: low estrogen and testosterone, lower libido, vaginal dryness, the unpredictable penis. It made me wonder. Was that the reality or were people over 60 having good or even great sex?

So I conducted a poll asking people 60+ to rate their sexual activity from 1 to 10 and to project how many orgasms they have left to experience. Seventy-five percent rated their sex as Good Sex (5+), and an impressive 30% rated theirs as Great Sex (8+). And what sexual optimism about the future! Eighty percent said they’ve not had their last orgasm, and 70% projected an infinite number of orgasms yet to come. Take that, actuarial tables.

Let's explore ways to enhance those future orgasms to make them better, more satisfying, and mind-blowing.

Things change. Bodies change. Your body didn’t stop liking pleasure. It just updated the instruction manual without telling you. What worked for arousal when you were younger may no longer hit the mark. That's okay. Here are some new ideas, tools, body parts, and activities that can take your orgasms up a notch. Who doesn't want that? With a little exploring and creativity, you might discover new things that really elevate your orgasms.

The goal of this list is to think outside the box and go beyond the usual suggestions of candlelight and romantic music. These aren't recommendations to swing from the chandelier or have sex in a crowded park, although either would pretty much guarantee a memorable orgasm, and possibly a court date. If a tip can enhance your orgasm even a notch, that's reason enough to try it. Going from good to great sex is pretty awesome.

Of course, not every sexual experience has to end in orgasm to be satisfying. But when an orgasm is on the menu, there's no reason not to make it spectacular.

Tips to Enhance Your Orgasms

The Trifecta

The first three aren't rocket science, but they're the most likely to guarantee the biggest payoff when you're older. You've heard them all before. Consider this your official invitation to actually do them. Think of them as the foundation of great sex.

Focus on Foreplay — The days of wham-bam sex are long gone, and honestly, they were overrated. Extended warm-ups are essential as you get older to get the blood flowing to your genitals. Slow down, take your time, and do everything at half-speed. Think of it as taking the scenic route: same destination, better views. Some sex therapists recommend a minimum of 30 minutes of foreplay. Focus on prolonged kissing, touching, and oral stimulation to build arousal. Touch everywhere — scalp, feet, ears, face, neck, the backs of the knees — and enjoy the whole playground. What used to work might not be enough now, and that's okay. Stop treating kissing and hugging like appetizers. Savor them as the main course. Linger and find pleasure.

Lots of Lube — Don't underestimate the power of a good lube on your vulva or penis. Lube doesn't just reduce friction and irritation, it makes your genitals more erotically sensitive. One critical technique note: never squirt lube directly onto anyone's genitals. Cold lube on warm skin is how a moan becomes a yodel. Squeeze it into your hand, warm it between your fingers, then smooth it on. You're going for spa treatment, not polar plunge. Solo or partnered, lube is a must-have and a definite enhancer.

Squeeze Your Pelvic Floor — Kegel exercises strengthen the pelvic floor muscles and help increase blood flow to your penis or vulva. They also intensify the muscle contractions during orgasm, which means more pleasure. They only take a few minutes a day: squeeze, relax, repeat. Do them while brushing your teeth, standing in line at Starbucks, or at every stop sign. (You just did one right now, didn't you? See how easy that was.) Stronger pelvic floor muscles mean better sex.

Beyond the Basics

Sexy Socks — You might not think wearing socks during sex is a turn-on. Science disagrees. Dutch researchers famously found that couples were far more likely to reach orgasm when they kept their socks on. Cold feet, it turns out, are a genuine buzzkill. When your feet are cold, your body diverts blood to warm your toes, and you want that blood headed to your genital area instead. Sensational sex is all about blood flow. So yes, your partner may laugh at your fuzzy socks. You'll get the last laugh.

Skip the French Fries — Regular exercise and healthy eating improve blood flow, which enhances sexual arousal. For men especially, erectile function and strength of arousal rely heavily on healthy circulation. Here's the thing: your cardiologist and your genitals want exactly the same thing. Normalizing your blood pressure and lowering your cholesterol isn't just good for your overall health. It supports your sexual health too. Think of every salad as foreplay. (Yes, that's probably the only sentence in history to combine kale and orgasms.)

Caress the Clitoris — Researchers now estimate the clitoris contains more than 10,000 nerve endings, and pleasure is its only job. It's the one organ in the human body that can say that. Consider it Command Central for a woman's orgasm and treat it with the respect it deserves. Get some lube, slow way down, caress, and see what explodes.

Dirty Does It — Talk dirty. It can be an incredible turn-on. Talk about what you'd like to try or reminisce about past sexual adventures. Too embarrassed? Get a grip. (Not like that. Well, fine like that too.) You're at least partially naked and about to partake in a gloriously intimate act. A few scandalous sentences are pretty tame by comparison. If you need training wheels, start with "I love it when you…" and let momentum handle the rest.

Icy Cold — Sex is like exercise and getting hot and sweaty can interfere with arousal. You want to stay cool: add a fan to the room and keep water nearby to stay hydrated. For a bit of excitement, grab some ice cubes. Traced slowly along the neck, inner arms, or thighs, that cool shock of sensation can move an orgasm up a notch. Goosebumps with a purpose.

Tech Detox — Establish a no-phones-in-bed rule. Your phone is a jealous lover: it trains your brain to expect a dopamine hit every thirty seconds, which makes the slower, mindful pacing of real intimacy feel like waiting for AOL to connect in comparison. And no one in recorded history has ever thought, "That orgasm was good, but I wish I'd checked my email first." Banish the phone. Your orgasms will thank you.

Buzz, Buzz, Buzz — When you get older, the physical mechanics of an orgasm may change, and you may find you need more direct or stronger stimulation to become aroused. Enter your new best friend: a vibrator with different speeds and intensities. Use it for direct clitoral or penile stimulation and let it hum in place for a while. There's no wrong way to use a vibrator. It's the rare gadget where skipping the manual and just experimenting is the whole point. Try different places on your body or your partner's and discover what feels best. Have a partner? Make it a threesome. Flying solo? You and your new best friend will manage just fine. Look for a model that builds intensity gradually rather than launching from zero to jackhammer, and one that can work for a long time to match your body's changing pace. Bonus tip for aging hands: models with easy-grip handles and simple buttons are kinder to stiff fingers.

Know Thyself — Solo sex can improve your sexual satisfaction and ultimately boost your orgasms. You'll discover what types of touch and stimulation feel best right now, which may have changed since last week, because bodies like to keep things interesting. You get to focus entirely on your own pleasure while increasing blood flow to the whole region, which supports arousal. For men and women alike, frequent solo sex builds sexual self-knowledge. Consider it continuing education: no grades, no tuition.

If you were asked how many orgasms you have left, how would you answer? Fewer than 10? Ten to 100? An unlimited number? Are you as sexually optimistic as the 70% of people over 60 in my survey who claimed an infinite future supply? However many orgasms you have left, they should be the best they can possibly be.

You owe it to yourself to try one new idea a week. Buy the lube. Wear the socks. Try a new vibrator. Kiss longer. Turn off the phone. Start your journey of empowering, positive sexuality as you age.

Remember, your birth certificate doesn't determine the quality of your orgasms.

Curiosity does.

(Image Source: Canva)