It’s true that getting older can bring physical changes that affect sexual desire. Hormonal changes, vaginal dryness, erectile difficulties, medications, health problems, and other changes in our bodies can all influence how interested we feel in sex.

Talking with your doctor about sex takes some planning and preparation. Below is a guide of things to do before and during the appointment to make the conversation easier and more helpful. Accept This One Crucial Truth: YOU Have to Bring It Up I cannot emphasize this enough: most doctors will not initiate a conversation about sex, especially with older patients.

When it comes to sex and aging, one thing is certain: there’s no such thing as a “one-size-fits-all” experience. Our bodies change, our hormones shift, and our joints ache, so it’s no surprise that our sex lives need a few adjustments too.

Let’s get something straight from the beginning: sex is not a performance, and your penis is not the star of a one-man show. Yet, many men become fixated on erections, framing any difficulties as “performance problems”—as if sex were a test to pass or fail. That mindset reflects a long-standing (and outdated) idea that men are the sole “deliverers” of sex. It’s time to rewrite that script.

If you're feeling a little uncomfortable about bringing up the topic of sex with your partner — whether you've been together for decades or just met someone special — congratulations: you're normal.